These are the composites of text messages I sent to my brother and friend P on the way to Boston on Thursday. I took the Bolt and I’m usually very good at getting a seat by myself. I have the “don’t sit by me look” down and it tends to work unless the bus is completely full. That’s what happened on Thursday, which is why these messages came about.
2:08 PM: I have the creepiest guy sitting beside me, ever. His computer background is an image naked butt. A very upclose image of a naked butt.
3:18 PM: Cute boy across from me just got the most intense facebook message from an ex-girlfriend and proceeded to call her and it’s just awkward as hell.
3:32 PM: They’re discussing their breakup, how she has him blocked on her phone, some hookup, and the angry fb message.
3:34 PM: Ok. Well now he’s calling someone else. Oh no, ex-girlfriend again!
3:40 PM: Or maybe current girlfriend because it ended in “I love you… Cara? Cara?” End of call.
3:45 PM: Oh shit, Cara cheated on this kid with his friend Daniel’s roommate. It’s like a soap opera here!
3:47 PM: They haven’t broken up. Just fighting. Mike and Lucy are going through the same thing.
3:50 PM: Oh I wonder if he cheated too? He has to show her everything on facebook. Dun dun dun.
3:52 PM: Ok, call’s over. He’ll call her off his home phone number tonight, once she unblocks his number.
3:55 PM: Now he and his friend on the bus are discussing the facebook message from a girl who MAY NOT BE CARA and may in fact be the OTHER WOMAN. Or it could be Cara. I don’t know. It’s positively riveting though.
4:03 PM: Andddd we’re backkk. He’s going back to NYC with Cara. Yay. But now he’s not allowed to talk to his friends because she hates them. God almighty.
4:07 PM: He’s going home with Cara on Monday. This shit’s dramatic.
4:08 PM: Uh oh… who’s Jamie?
4:09 PM: Okay, so another guy also hearts Cara and Bus Boy wants to kick his ass because he’s a “scumbag”. This term is repeated multiple times. This is deep stuff for a bus.
4:11 PM: I’m giving up on these kids. There’s someone else named Luke involved and even they’re confused.
Just for the record, I’m not a total creeper. This boy was literally shouting and the entire bus was listening. It was impossible to ignore him, especially when he was on the phone with Cara. Oh, and because I’m not a completely terrible person, I’ve also gone through and changed the names. You’re welcome, nameless Bus Boy.
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